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Have you ever spent time with a group of beautiful people, and been overwhelmed by what you perceive is your own inadequacy? This recently happened to me. I felt like I did not measure up, like I could never reach their level of beauty and grace. So I sat at a party, separate from everyone, while I sunk into feelings of invisibility and inadequacy. Later, a wise friend pointed out that I was in my head, letting my mind tell me lies; and unfortunately, I was buying into them.

If I had telepathic abilities, I would have been able to reach into the other women’s minds; I might have noticed the same thoughts running through some of the women’s heads. Some would dismiss the thought and go about their business, moving with grace and ease through the world. Others might be affected by the thoughts, holding themselves back, afraid of showing up, just like I was. Some of them may have looked at me; seeing a lovely woman at peace, having a quiet moment; never guessing about the turmoil inside.

What quality makes it possible for a woman to gracefully navigate the complexities of social interaction? I believe the qualities include a deep self-acceptance, a love for humanity, an openness to simply being, and a willingness to risk putting yourself out there for a chance of deep connection.

The illusion of separation plagues many in our society. The reality is that we are never alone. We are connected to each other through an intricate web of energy. But our ego, in trying to keep us safe from potential hurts, feeds us thoughts of separation. I wallowed in these thoughts for one evening, causing myself to miss out on what would have been an evening filled with fun. However, I quickly shook of the illusion of separation, returning to a state of self acceptance within an hour or so.

What can you do to find self-acceptance? How can you raise your bar of expectations so that you risk being more connected? For me, it started with meditation, learning to quiet the mind so that truth can flow in. Mirror work of doing self-affirmations will also help. Marissa Peer’s message of “I am enough” will boost you immeasurably. Practicing gratitude for humanity is another method of growth that helped me. There are many healing modalities that can remove the blocks to self-acceptance. Find what works for you and integrate the tools into your life. You can move through this world with grace, if you allow yourself to grow in this way. Sending you blessings…