Everyone is triggered from time to time; it is part of being human. But when someone's behavior triggers us, it provides us with an opportunity to delve into our psyche. So let's take a moment to pick this one apart!
We are triggered when we are yelled at, someone let us down, or someone says something which causes us pain. Then, we point our fingers and blame the other person, saying their behavior caused us pain.
But did it? Anytime we are blaming, we are in victim energy. When we believe others victimize us, we have no power to create a change in the situation. I am amazed at how long I chose to stay in this victim energy before upgrading my life.
I learned that our emotions are energy; they are information to help us understand ourselves. When we were children, we were triggered by something our parents, teachers, or ministers said or did. However, we weren't taught to deal with our emotions, so we repressed or escaped those painful feelings. Feelings are energy, and when repressed, the energy stops flowing—the energy sticks with us, embedded in our cellular structure.
When we grow up, we don't think about what happened to us as kids. Yet, the energy is still buried in our bodies. When someone says or does something that triggers us, that sleeping energy is awakened. We react to the energy of the feelings we are feeling, but the feelings include long-buried emotions.
An Empowered Choice
There is another option for us that takes us into our psyche and helps us heal our inner wounds. You see, we would not react to someone's behavior if it didn't awaken within us a reaction based on our inner wounds. We become empowered when we can see the other person giving us a gift of introspection instead of seeing them as our persecutors.
The people in our lives are mirrors for us, reflecting our emotional triggers. When we are reactive, we are not in the present; we are caught up and reacting to our past wounding. So how do we get off this merry-go-round? Freedom begins with the AAA method, introduced by Dr. Donald Epstien of EpiEnergetics: Aware, Acknowlege, Accept.
Become aware that you are reactive. Feel the energy of the feelings. However, be aware that your reaction may be based on wounding from your past.
Acknowledge that you are feeling the feelings. Acknowlege that the feelings may be rooted in a past wounding.
Accept that it is ok for you to feel the feelings, and allow the feelings to flow. This acceptance and allowing is key to transmuting the stuck energy.
Emotional freedom begins when we transmute our stuck emotional energies, allowing us to let go of our triggers. When we see our persecutors as our mirrors, when we recognize that our reactions include buried emotions, when we take a breath and actually let the feelings flow, we are on our way to emotional freedom.
The biochemistry of emotion lasts for about 90 seconds, any longer it means our brains have become enmeshed in the idea of that emotion. When we let the feelings flow, they will dissipate. When we face our painful feelings we step forth in bravery; knowing that in the end, we will eventually find freedom.
Stuck emotions are a bit like an onion; each time you allow a stuck feeling to flow, you unpeel one layer of the onion. So give yourself grace, the stuck emotion will arise again and someone will trigger you. But over time, your reactivity lessens.
My hope for you is that you are blessed with emotional freedom!